in my last couple of posts, i've signed off with the phrase "fighting the fight". heres why.
underneath the slave beats the heart of a gentleman, a no nonsense, no bullshitting person, who would take the shirt off his back if someone else needed it. i have my own views on right and wrong, and how i see the world. often it can bring arguments and heated discussions, especially if its something i am passionate about or if someone i deeply care about is in trouble. in the distant past it has led to physical altercations too.
you might be asking whats brought all this about? well, the week thats just gone has been a good one, Mistress and I are going great guns, even when someone had the audacity to use some of Mistresses pictures as their own on a well known fetish community site. i got annoyed, and it took Mistress a while to calm me down as i went from zero to raging at the still invisible imposter. i cannot help this, even though Mistress is an amazingly tactful and independent woman, i feel very protective over Her and what is Hers. i suppose thats what being in love is all about.
on a minor point, Mistress, Miss Beth, myself and Miss Beths boy went to Kage at the weekend. it was a great event, however, on the site i mentioned earlier i left a discussion on there about dress codes etc. people were wandering about the club in jeans and street clothes etc, which to be honest i dont think fits in that type of environment. 99% of the comments were well balanced and thought out, bringing both sides of the argument into perspective. except one, which actually got my hackles up.
the person who wrote it used the phrase "stop policing peoples expressions. just stop". straight away i had to hold myself back from telling him where to go. the thread had been closed by the group owner, before i had chance to reply, so i sent a message to him, politely putting my reasons for the thread across. as i said, he used the phrase above, and asked him was he not doing the same to me as what he thought i was doing by writing the discussion. as yet i have not recieved a reply, to be honest i wont be surprised if i dont get one back.
bottom line is this. i'm an ex soldier. fighting is something that sadly comes naturally to me, i'm still paying thed consequences for past operational tours (see other posts). i will fight for what i belive is right, and will defend my right to say it, and defend people who i think are being unfairly picked on.
fighting the fight (as always)
j.
Monday 1 October 2012
Monday 17 September 2012
hypnosis for dummies
today has been a real eye opener... well, sort of. Mistress and I have been discussing a little experiment She'd thought up for when She placed me into a trance, whereby i literally become a waxwork mannequin on command. suffice to say Mistress had some fun this morning!
as usual Mistress was teasing me, rubbing Her fingers over my head, basically getting me into the zone, then bam... She uttered those immortal words and i was under. i cant remember what She said to me while i was entranced, however She has explained that She had placed a couple of deepeners on me, to make me relax completely, and also implanted the new trigger, to turn me into Her personal mannequin, to do with as She pleases.
so onto the acid test. Mistress brought me out of my trance, and after a couple of minutes teasing and "will i won't i" She said the trigger words. up until She brought me out of it, i really have no memory of what happened apart from a couple of vivid flashbacks of me doing "i'm a little teapot". from what Mistress has told me, She was very pleased with the speed i went under, given recent events in my life (see previous blog posts) and the way i just stood there, glazed, blank, in other words her personal mindless puppet.
i think this sounds like Mistress is having fun. total control at its finest.
fighting the fight, and for once gaining ground
slave J
as usual Mistress was teasing me, rubbing Her fingers over my head, basically getting me into the zone, then bam... She uttered those immortal words and i was under. i cant remember what She said to me while i was entranced, however She has explained that She had placed a couple of deepeners on me, to make me relax completely, and also implanted the new trigger, to turn me into Her personal mannequin, to do with as She pleases.
so onto the acid test. Mistress brought me out of my trance, and after a couple of minutes teasing and "will i won't i" She said the trigger words. up until She brought me out of it, i really have no memory of what happened apart from a couple of vivid flashbacks of me doing "i'm a little teapot". from what Mistress has told me, She was very pleased with the speed i went under, given recent events in my life (see previous blog posts) and the way i just stood there, glazed, blank, in other words her personal mindless puppet.
i think this sounds like Mistress is having fun. total control at its finest.
fighting the fight, and for once gaining ground
slave J
what happens when....
well, the last few weeks theres been trouble brewing. yet again i cannot thank Mistress enough for Her wisdom, patience, guidance and constant reassurance after yet another, this time major panic attack.
it all started on friday, Mistress, Miss Beth and I were at Mistresses chambers, when i just had to leave the room. i ended up in a quivering blubbering heap on the floor in the kitchen, which is amazing as you couldnt even swing a cat in there. after a few minutes to let me simmer, Mistress came in, and that was it. the floodgates opened.
when i do have a panic attack, my body and mind goes into overdrive. every one of my worst fears come into my head, and i think stupid irrational things, from people not caring right up to wanting to end my life. luckily, Mistress could see straight away how bad this one was and was kneeling next to me, letting me just hold on to Her in between sobs and runny noses. i honestly cant remember what caused it or why it happened, i can only assume it was just because i've been so run down recently, and its just came to a fore.
anyway, the cure has been very simple. after everyone had left, i was lying on Mistresses Bondage table trying to gather my thoughts. Mistress laid with me, well, more on top of me, and the next thing i knew, She had put me into a trance. (as you will see from previous blog posts, She has placed many previous hypnotic suggestions, and apparently i go into a trance without any drama!) from what She told me, She removed all the unhappiness and stress and more or less commanded my subconcious to cheer up. apart from a few minor wobbles, its worked! i feel a lot brighter now, but even so, i KNOW that no matter what happens, i will have a panic attack again. its just a matter of when, and what i can do to combat it.
fighting the fight...
Slave J
it all started on friday, Mistress, Miss Beth and I were at Mistresses chambers, when i just had to leave the room. i ended up in a quivering blubbering heap on the floor in the kitchen, which is amazing as you couldnt even swing a cat in there. after a few minutes to let me simmer, Mistress came in, and that was it. the floodgates opened.
when i do have a panic attack, my body and mind goes into overdrive. every one of my worst fears come into my head, and i think stupid irrational things, from people not caring right up to wanting to end my life. luckily, Mistress could see straight away how bad this one was and was kneeling next to me, letting me just hold on to Her in between sobs and runny noses. i honestly cant remember what caused it or why it happened, i can only assume it was just because i've been so run down recently, and its just came to a fore.
anyway, the cure has been very simple. after everyone had left, i was lying on Mistresses Bondage table trying to gather my thoughts. Mistress laid with me, well, more on top of me, and the next thing i knew, She had put me into a trance. (as you will see from previous blog posts, She has placed many previous hypnotic suggestions, and apparently i go into a trance without any drama!) from what She told me, She removed all the unhappiness and stress and more or less commanded my subconcious to cheer up. apart from a few minor wobbles, its worked! i feel a lot brighter now, but even so, i KNOW that no matter what happens, i will have a panic attack again. its just a matter of when, and what i can do to combat it.
fighting the fight...
Slave J
Monday 3 September 2012
slave camps, photography and life itself
hi everyone, well, its been ages since i blogged (yet again), but for both Mistress and I its been a hectic month. I've finally settled in with Mistress and Her family, and the pace of life is often frenetic, but enjoyable at the same time. Mistress has been busy organising Her new project, a slave camp, where both Herself and Her partner in crime Miss Beth recieve slaves for a morning or afternoon sessions of manual labour, and lots of fun, teasing, and general humiliation of slaves who come to take part. The inaugural slave camp was a roaring success, and will now be held on the last friday of every month.
on a more personal note, i've been busy myself. i have been a hobby photographer with my trusty iPhone for some time, and after sharing pictures on twitter and facebook, people told me i shoudl really try and push more into it. so, armed with my phone i took more pictures, downloaded a photo enhancing suite called.... GIMP (oh the irony!), as i refuse to fork out over £700 for flipping photoshop! and then away i went. i also joined an american website, which i've put the link below. The pictures i have on that profile are all for sale, at reasonable prices, so if you like my work then please please make a purchase of a limited edition picture. i say limited edition, because once one is bought it will be taken off the site and not used again. on saturday just past, i was surprised by a package from the postman, and it was a new digital camera, purchased as a gift by my absolutely gorgeous generous Mistress. We went out on sunday and road tested it, and i got some amazing shots, which i have posted on here.
this is the link to my profile on the photo site.
http://fineartamerica.com/profiles/11-james-smith.html
every image bought is framed, posted and handled by the website owners, so its very high quality.
personal life is going well. Mistress and i met up with Miss Beth and Her boy last week at Kage club, in which Mistress and Miss Beth bought new hitty toys and then proceeded to test them on both me and Miss Beth's boy, even at one point forming a tag team and swapping to hit each others respective slave! after that we retired into the clubs pool for a relaxing dip, and then had to leave to come home.
all in all, life is going really well at the minute. the art site is going well, my relationship with Mistress is going from strength to strength, and life is continually being nice to me for a change!
here are some of the new images from my new camera, which are now on the website.
on a more personal note, i've been busy myself. i have been a hobby photographer with my trusty iPhone for some time, and after sharing pictures on twitter and facebook, people told me i shoudl really try and push more into it. so, armed with my phone i took more pictures, downloaded a photo enhancing suite called.... GIMP (oh the irony!), as i refuse to fork out over £700 for flipping photoshop! and then away i went. i also joined an american website, which i've put the link below. The pictures i have on that profile are all for sale, at reasonable prices, so if you like my work then please please make a purchase of a limited edition picture. i say limited edition, because once one is bought it will be taken off the site and not used again. on saturday just past, i was surprised by a package from the postman, and it was a new digital camera, purchased as a gift by my absolutely gorgeous generous Mistress. We went out on sunday and road tested it, and i got some amazing shots, which i have posted on here.
this is the link to my profile on the photo site.
http://fineartamerica.com/profiles/11-james-smith.html
every image bought is framed, posted and handled by the website owners, so its very high quality.
personal life is going well. Mistress and i met up with Miss Beth and Her boy last week at Kage club, in which Mistress and Miss Beth bought new hitty toys and then proceeded to test them on both me and Miss Beth's boy, even at one point forming a tag team and swapping to hit each others respective slave! after that we retired into the clubs pool for a relaxing dip, and then had to leave to come home.
all in all, life is going really well at the minute. the art site is going well, my relationship with Mistress is going from strength to strength, and life is continually being nice to me for a change!
here are some of the new images from my new camera, which are now on the website.
Friday 3 August 2012
fresh start, new beginnings.
well, so much has happened since my last post. ive ben spending the last couple of weeks packing up my flat, ready for a new start, as Mistress has invited me to live with Her. so from tomorrow, i will be packed up and waiting for Mistress to arrive with a van, and then its off to sunny stockport forever.
to be honest, this has been a long time coming. ive been stagnating here since 2008, living like a hermit, and not really going out. however, Mistress has brought out the old me from my shell, the happy go lucky cheeky little sod i am. i'm really happy about this, albeit a little nervous, as i'm a bit of a OCD freak about change (frankly it makes me anxious, but it really is for the best!)
Mistress and i are getting on better now after my SNAFU, and our love is getting to be such a strong bond. i never actually thought i'd be this deeply in love again, after being hurt so much by certain people. my family are behind me 100% in this as well, which makes a huge bonus, and they are looking forward to meeting Mistress as well.
the other side of me, slave j, is starting to come into his own as well. no more thinking about his needs, more of what he can do for his Mistress, to make Her happy. i'm just a really happy bunny now, relaxed and confident, even if the forthcvoming move is a tad scary!!
peace out!
to be honest, this has been a long time coming. ive been stagnating here since 2008, living like a hermit, and not really going out. however, Mistress has brought out the old me from my shell, the happy go lucky cheeky little sod i am. i'm really happy about this, albeit a little nervous, as i'm a bit of a OCD freak about change (frankly it makes me anxious, but it really is for the best!)
Mistress and i are getting on better now after my SNAFU, and our love is getting to be such a strong bond. i never actually thought i'd be this deeply in love again, after being hurt so much by certain people. my family are behind me 100% in this as well, which makes a huge bonus, and they are looking forward to meeting Mistress as well.
the other side of me, slave j, is starting to come into his own as well. no more thinking about his needs, more of what he can do for his Mistress, to make Her happy. i'm just a really happy bunny now, relaxed and confident, even if the forthcvoming move is a tad scary!!
peace out!
Tuesday 26 June 2012
really got to blog more often!
i cant believe its over a month since i posted. so much has happened, mostly good, some bad, but i'm not dwelling on that. Mistress and i have been together for 7 months now, and going from strength to strength. if You are a reader of Her blog, You will find a lot of whats happened between us on there.
over the last few weeks, i've been busy myself. i moved into a temprorary flat and on the same day Mistress came to visit for the weekend. we had a lot of fun just re aquainting ourselves with each other, and the day after my birthday we travelled to Her home for a week long stay. proof our relationship is getting stronger all the time!
all too soon though, i had to return home, as i was going away for a week. that week passed quickly, it was a therapy centre for ex servicemen with mental health problems. thankfully it wasnt TOO emotional, i relaxed with fishing, just pulling trout out of the river doon was relaxing.
i arrived back with Mistress on sunday. and since then my training has gone up a gear. the hypnosis She is using on me works a treat, and She has found a way to combine our love of hypnosis with a love of latex, something which Mistress really enjoys seeing me in. Yesterday for example, i was wearing my thigh length rubber shorts, with the zip in front, Mistress, really had a ball placing me in a trance and placing 2 new triggers in my subconcious, which drive me wild with desire and further under her control. today, after a bath and a shave (face and crotch) i dressed in my rubber sheath pants, which Mistress had not seen me in until today....and i think She is pleased with them!
at this moment in time, i am sat at Mistresses feet writing this, with a well earned cigarette and coffee. we've just spent the last 40 minutes on a bed with me being given the honour and privildge to worship Mistresses sexy body from head to toe. i was in heaven when i was worshipping and licking her amazing bottom, and playing with her gorgeously wet pussy and clit. Her orgasms give me a thrill, as i revel in Her writhing and moaning in pure ecstasy. i am glad i can please Her in that way, as i'm in chastity still, although my (Her) cock is not locked up as of yet.
the future is looking bright. i'll be moving to Her home very soon, for which i cant wait, i'll be sad to go home at the weekend, but i know i'll be back again soon. i've attached a couple of pictures hopefully which will show the happiness i have found.
until later,
slave j
over the last few weeks, i've been busy myself. i moved into a temprorary flat and on the same day Mistress came to visit for the weekend. we had a lot of fun just re aquainting ourselves with each other, and the day after my birthday we travelled to Her home for a week long stay. proof our relationship is getting stronger all the time!
all too soon though, i had to return home, as i was going away for a week. that week passed quickly, it was a therapy centre for ex servicemen with mental health problems. thankfully it wasnt TOO emotional, i relaxed with fishing, just pulling trout out of the river doon was relaxing.
i arrived back with Mistress on sunday. and since then my training has gone up a gear. the hypnosis She is using on me works a treat, and She has found a way to combine our love of hypnosis with a love of latex, something which Mistress really enjoys seeing me in. Yesterday for example, i was wearing my thigh length rubber shorts, with the zip in front, Mistress, really had a ball placing me in a trance and placing 2 new triggers in my subconcious, which drive me wild with desire and further under her control. today, after a bath and a shave (face and crotch) i dressed in my rubber sheath pants, which Mistress had not seen me in until today....and i think She is pleased with them!
at this moment in time, i am sat at Mistresses feet writing this, with a well earned cigarette and coffee. we've just spent the last 40 minutes on a bed with me being given the honour and privildge to worship Mistresses sexy body from head to toe. i was in heaven when i was worshipping and licking her amazing bottom, and playing with her gorgeously wet pussy and clit. Her orgasms give me a thrill, as i revel in Her writhing and moaning in pure ecstasy. i am glad i can please Her in that way, as i'm in chastity still, although my (Her) cock is not locked up as of yet.
the future is looking bright. i'll be moving to Her home very soon, for which i cant wait, i'll be sad to go home at the weekend, but i know i'll be back again soon. i've attached a couple of pictures hopefully which will show the happiness i have found.
until later,
Thursday 10 May 2012
wow... just wow
well, its the end of an amazing week. on the spur of the moment, i sent a text to Mistress asking if i could come down to Her home, and She readily agreed, so once the council had inspected my flat (shoddy building work, but felt awkward when they wanted to go into my wardrobes, seeing as i had fetish gear hanging up!) but as soon as they were finished, so was i.
once i arrived, i just felt a wave of relief, knowing i'd be there for a while at Mistresses request. the first night was just magical, spending time getting re-aquainted with each other, relaxing and just being happy. the next day, i helped Her with Her shopping, and we had a day in town with Her mum, which was great.
later on in the evening, Mistress had decided now was the time to try hypnosis. now this was something i had never ever attempted before, so i was a little nervous. however, within the first time of relaxing, i was put under a trance, which was going well until the sodding phone rang! but, once the call was finished with, Mistress had no problem placing me back under, and basicallyopened my mind to Her, in which She placed a post hypnotic suggestion or 3 (one to put me back into a deep sleep, one purely for Her amusement... and mine) and then we went home.
on the friday, Mistress and i went to Her work place, and She took great delight in playing with the trigger words, watching me writhe and buck under her spell! we had a quiet day, but it was nice to just spend time with each other.
saturday and this was the night, we went to the cottage fetish party, a great venue with friendly people, which is invite only. we dressed, we ate, we played, and the party was really getting started as we left at midnight, but again it was a great night just to spend time with Her.
on sunday we just relaxed, waiting for monday, a day i'd spend with Mistress and Her family, as we'd planned to go out for the day, to blackpool. however, i did surprise Mistress by proposing to Her! monday came and we were up early, and in blackpool for 10 am, and had a great time, not even the rain spoiled it!
on the tuesday, Mistress wanted to put on a cam show with us both starring in it, however, sadly no-one wanted to watch (thier loss!) and also with that, She placed me into a trance, speaking with my subconcious mind, and again reinforcing the post hypno suggestions. on the evening we went and visited Miss Beth, and She was amazed and highly amused when Mistress made me think that everything i looked at was hilarious!
sadly though wednesday came all too soon. i ended up leaviing with tears in my eyes, and am now home, although i am making plans to get back there as soon as possible!
once i arrived, i just felt a wave of relief, knowing i'd be there for a while at Mistresses request. the first night was just magical, spending time getting re-aquainted with each other, relaxing and just being happy. the next day, i helped Her with Her shopping, and we had a day in town with Her mum, which was great.
later on in the evening, Mistress had decided now was the time to try hypnosis. now this was something i had never ever attempted before, so i was a little nervous. however, within the first time of relaxing, i was put under a trance, which was going well until the sodding phone rang! but, once the call was finished with, Mistress had no problem placing me back under, and basicallyopened my mind to Her, in which She placed a post hypnotic suggestion or 3 (one to put me back into a deep sleep, one purely for Her amusement... and mine) and then we went home.
on the friday, Mistress and i went to Her work place, and She took great delight in playing with the trigger words, watching me writhe and buck under her spell! we had a quiet day, but it was nice to just spend time with each other.
saturday and this was the night, we went to the cottage fetish party, a great venue with friendly people, which is invite only. we dressed, we ate, we played, and the party was really getting started as we left at midnight, but again it was a great night just to spend time with Her.
on sunday we just relaxed, waiting for monday, a day i'd spend with Mistress and Her family, as we'd planned to go out for the day, to blackpool. however, i did surprise Mistress by proposing to Her! monday came and we were up early, and in blackpool for 10 am, and had a great time, not even the rain spoiled it!
on the tuesday, Mistress wanted to put on a cam show with us both starring in it, however, sadly no-one wanted to watch (thier loss!) and also with that, She placed me into a trance, speaking with my subconcious mind, and again reinforcing the post hypno suggestions. on the evening we went and visited Miss Beth, and She was amazed and highly amused when Mistress made me think that everything i looked at was hilarious!
sadly though wednesday came all too soon. i ended up leaviing with tears in my eyes, and am now home, although i am making plans to get back there as soon as possible!
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